Girl In The City

Powerful

Friday, November 14th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

I know I said it would be the end of the political blog posts for awhile but I think this is somebody every singel person in the country should have to watch. If you support gay marriage, if you aren’t sure how you feel about it, and especially if you don’t, you need to watch this.

I know that I’ve completely failed the whole NaBloPoMo thing and I will touch on it in another post soon. Until then, watch the video, email it to a friend, post it on your own blog, spread the word because it’s important.

Tags: gay marriage, love, prop 8

In which I embrace my slacktitude.

Tuesday, November 11th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

OH HEY! LOOK AT THAT! There was no post make yesterday. OOPS!

Actually, I totally sat down to post at one point but accidentally ended up playing WOW for 20 minutes then somehow ended up looking at cerebral palsy lawyers online then then decided to “lay down to watch the rest of CSI” and then suddenly it was 2:00AM and Ben was waking me up to get into bed. At that point it was already today so I figured I’d just shoot this off first thing in the morning.

TECHNICALLY I failed but I choose to say that yesterday was called on account of stress and sleep. So, it was really just a minor delay. *nods to self* I’ll get back on track with a post this evening! Until then I leave you with the best news since… Well, since Tuesday night!

GAS DROPPED OVER $.25 IN THREE DAYS! I think this is the firt time in over a year we’ve paid under $3.00 for gas. A few months ago it was knocking on $5.00’s door.

Declaring the winner.

Tuesday, November 11th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

I’m glad that Obama won. I was elated. I teared up during his speech. It was moving, and hopeful and exactly what I think the entire nation needed to hear. I am so looking forward to this amazing person who will be leading our nation into the future.

All that said, I’m somewhat disheartened by the reaction that I’m seeing online. Republicans saying DELUSIONAL things like “Obama is a Muslim! He can’t be Christian! He didn’t thank GOD in his speech!” Then Democrats saying “You are prejudice because you didn’t vote for Obama!”

Republicans attacking republicans for not being pissed off enough and Democrats attacking Democrats for saying that John McCain gave an amazing concession speech.

AND OH MY GOD PEOPLE CHILL OUT!

What happened yesterday was AMAZING. People from BOTH sides turned out in record numbers. You fought for what you believed in, you took the time to make your voice heard, you stood in line, you made a difference! Even if your guy didn’t win, even if you voted for the opposite side as me, I’m SO PROUD of every single person that went out and voted. I’m thankful for every single person that understood the importance of this election. I’m so proud that we ALL, TOGETHER, made history yesterday.

Please, I beg you, let this be a time to heal. Lets allow ourselves to band together and use the passion we felt yesterday to work together and make the changes we all know need to be made. WE will ALL play a major part in how the next four years play out and right now, today, this very second, you can decide what kind of future you want it to be.

Now I feel like I need to go out and get some term life insurance because my heart is SERIOUSLY DAMAGES from all the election drama.

OKAY!

I promise, this is the last of my political blog posts for awhile. I want to post some about Prop 8 but I think I made it clear Monday exactly what my feelings are and, like I said above, right now I need to look forward and have faith that we will work together as a state to figure this out.

SO HAPPY BLOGGING TOMORROW! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!

And I might possibly do a Me Today video because I feel like shakin’ things up a bit. Have a topic you want me to talk about or a question you want me to answer? Leave a comment or use the form on the contact page to send me an email and you’ll get the answer LIVE AND IN VIDEO.

Ethics 101: Don’t Profit from an idea you oppose. It doesn’t make (ad)sense.

Monday, November 3rd, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

*deep cleansing breath*

The following is a transcript of a google chat Ben and I had this morning. Bimmerforums is a HUGE BMW community visited by thousands of people day.

9:18 AM Benjamin: there are fucking prop8 ads on bimmerforums!
9:19 AM me: For YES?
Benjamin: They’re flash, so can’t link ‘em, buf if you sign in, you can probably see ‘em
yes
me: Yes on 8?
WTF?!
9:20 AM WOW, I can’t believe that people are not raising hell.
9:23 AM Benjamin: you should logon, and look at the footer graphics
9:24 AM what really gets me going…
is that most of their footer graphics are tiny
like 120×60
and the prop8 images are huge
like 500×100
even taller?
strange
9:27 AM me: I can’t believe there isn’t a thread started abuot that.
9:28 AM Or that a forum would actually support for OR against such a heavily debated topic.
They should stay neutral.
Always.

Having worked for or owned forums in the past I know that as an admin (and this is ESPECIALLY true of you have advertisers, of which Bimmerforums has MANY) that you have to stay neutral in debates as heated as Prop 8. For OR against. Period. And since BF has a pretty ‘healthy’ debate forum I was surprised not to see a thread started about the ad but I was busy and didn’t have a lot of time to research so figured I’d put it off till later. Then as I was browsing my google reader feeds I came across a TechCrunch article talking about the mass spam of Yes on 8 all across the internet.

11:41 AM me: That’s a google adsense ad on Bimmerforums.
11:42 AM They didn’t put it there, Google did, but STILL. They have the ability to remove that BS
12:47 PM Benjamin: on the footer?
these are static ads
12:48 PM me: the bottom ones are. The prop 8 one is a google ad
Generaged by an ad script
Benjamin: it doesn’t change
me: I know that.
Benjamin: does that mean that google supports yes on 8?
me: Because right now, Prop 8 is paying them a butt ton of money to have it there
12:49 PM No, it means that google is giving the ad more play because they gave google more money
12:50 PM Saw this article: link
Then checked bimmerforums code and that ad is being generated by the google javascript ad software.
12:51 PM Look at my site right now!
YES ON 8! from the google ad!
@(#%(@&&(@$&(@#$@
That’s the end of google ads on my site forever.
12:52 PM Benjamin: so,…. is it google?
me: yeah, that’s what I was saying
12:56 PM I thought google ads were supposed to be relevent to what was ON THE SITE.
It was Yes on 8 on sylaa.net too and that has NEVER have a SINGLE political post. eVER
12:57 PM Fuck google.

I immediately pulled google ads off all three of the sites I was currently running them on. And the thing is, I never actually thought I’d make any money off those ads. Who ACTUALLY clicks google ads anymore anyway? I had them as more of a wink and a nod to google. I use a lot of their software. Search, gmail, Google Reader, Goolge chat, Google calendar, Google maps, Google Analytics, Google Docs to share documents with Ben… Holy shit I just realized that I’m Google’s BITCH!

Ummm, where was I?

So as kind of a show of support, I had the google ads there. Like, HEY LOOK! I like Google enough to allow them to SPAM all of you! But not anymore. When I changed my facebook status in protest Kris pointed out:

Prop 8 is about equality. Google accepted the Yes on 8 ads indiscriminately. Sergey Brin & Larry Page have donated $140,000 to the No on 8 campaign.

I kind of glossed over the “Prop 8 is about equality” because; NO! And I do understand that Google will say they were acting without prejudice to EITHER side when they agreed to allow the ad, but the last statement is what got me. My answer was:

And Eric Schmidt publicly stated he’s against prop 8, I get it. But *I*, as a site owner, don’t have to be equal. Also, I’ve never, in all my geekly web scouring, been shown the SAME ad on EVERY SINGLE site I go to with adsense enabled. EVER. It’s great they’ve donated all that money to No on 8… Wonder how much google MADE by spamming the ad all over the internet?

I’d be really interested in knowing just how much Google made off an ad that was on EVERY SINGLE SITE I VISITED WITH ADSENSE ENABLED. I have a feeling it’s somewhere North of $140,000 which I understand is money to the COMPANY, not the PEOPLE, but still! To me, the fact that you allowed yourself to PROFIT from the Yes campaign while being so AGAINST it is weak. WEAK. Stand up and take a stance! MAKE a difference! If you believe something so strongly that you are willing to shell out $140,000 towards the campaign, go the extra mile and actually BE A PART OF THE CHANGE. Don’t PROFIT from the opposing view!

I know it’s very easy for me to sit here on my glass pedestal (and isn’t it pretty?!) but after watching exhausting coverage of this election year, donating my money, sporting the t-shirts, blogging my views, I’d just like to see SOMEBODY stand up and make a REALLY bold move.

In conclusion: VOTE TOMORROW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY! Vote for whoever you think is the best candidate for YOU and the way YOU believe gay marriage should go (if that applies to your state), JUST MAKE SURE YOU VOTE! PLEASE!

Stress.

Thursday, October 30th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

UHG. I’ve had the worst week this week. For serious. It’s been on emotional brick after another being thrown at me head and I feel like I just want to run upstairs and hide in my bead. I’m tired of being knocked down over and over and over again. Usually I have no problem picking myself back up and dusting myself off but this week ti’s gotten increasingly harder. And now my face is starting to break out because of it. YAY. Now instead of sitting online to relax and read some blogs or play some WOW I’m having to look for some good acne vulgaris treatment treatments. I need a break…

Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help you reach it faster, too.

Wednesday, October 29th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

Last Thursday we found out that Cassidy and her friend, Laura, had been going to a corner store in the morning and buying candy and other assorted junk food. I’m not sure if you all remember the time almost a year ago where she dissappeared for about 20 minutes and I almost had a nervous breakdown right as the cops found her? Well ever since then I’ve tried to balance her freedom with some simple rules. Mainly, you have to tell me where you’re going BEFORE you go. And here’s the thing, I told her had she ASKED me to go to the store in the morning, I’d have more than likely said to go ahead and go AS LONG AS she wasn’t late to school.

The main problem I had with her little escapade was that she has to walk in the OPPOSITE direction as school to get to the store and if for some reason something had happened, I’d never have even CONSIDERED telling anybody to look down that direction because WHY WOULD SHE BE THERE?!

Here, graphical representation:

I tweeted that she was “seriously grounded” and I meant it. Two weeks in the room and no electronics. Harsh, I know and by Sunday I was missing her like crazy and when Mali DM’d me on twitter and was all PUMPKIN PATCH! I told her WE ARE SO THERE! And I let Cassidy go with me. At the time, I didn’t think it was that big a deal but, believe me, it was discussed at length afterward and I know that I shouldn’t have done that. I’m the softy. I’m always the one that caves and lets her do stuff like go have fun while she’s supposed to be grounded. This is really one of the few things that Ben and I argue about. My being a push over which results in him having to stand up and be “the bad guy”. It’s not fair to him at all so after that I promised to try and be better about being more strict so he could focus on being less “sole bad guy” and more “funny fun dude who likes to have fun”.

Ben and I mutually agreed Wednesday that she could be on ‘probation’ for the remainder of her grounding but that if EVEN ONE TIME she lied or was dishonest that the grounding would pick up at that point and she’d have to finish out her last week of grounding. I even pointed out to her at one point that if that happened, her gounding would overlap Halloween and wouldn’t that TOTALLY SUCK?

Tonight would have been the final night of probation. TONIGHT.

TONIGHT! So when we had just gotten done taking pictures of her in her Princess Leia costume earlier this evening and I got a call from her teacher telling me that Cassidy was late to school today, and this was the SECOND time she’d been late, I thought that CERTAINLY SHE WASN’T AT THAT DAMN STORE.

I called her downstairs and asked her what time she got to school today.

Cassidy: *deer in headlights look* I was late because I got up late and left late.
Me: You called me at 7:32 to tell me you were leaving.
Cassidy: I didn’t tell you what time it was.
Me: My phone keeps track of the time you call me. You called me at 7:32 and Ms. Walker said you got to school at 8:16.
Cassidy: Oh.
Me: I am going to give you one chance to tell me the truth and it would be your best bet to be honest with me RIGHT NOW because I will send that costume back in a second of you aren’t.
Cassidy: Laura had money and she wanted to go to the store so we went and were late.

*motherfuckingsigh*

After more probing it wasn’t LAURA that had money, it was Cassidy and it wasn’t LAURA that wanted to go to the store, it was Cassidy. As a matter of fact, she had decided BEFORE she left the house and BEFORE she left me a message saying she was leaving that she had decided to go to the store.

So this time I know the punishment has to be severe. Grounded, no electronics for a week. That means no school carnival tomorrow, no trick-or-treating and no birthday party for Carrielee (BFF and aunt extraordinaire) on Sunday. The last being the one that seemed to effect her the most.

And it. Is. Killing. Me. I KNOW that this has to be done. I KNOW that if I don’t enforce this we’ll be back here in a month. I KNOW it has to be really hard on her to get the point across and it’s KILLING ME. I look so forward to Halloween and getting to take her out. We’ve never missed a single birthday of Carrielee’s. I feel like a horrible person for doing this to her and I KNOW I shouldn’t.

And at the core of it all: I don’t want her to grow up resenting me the way I resent my mother.

I’m taking these things away from her and I don’t want her to hate me for it but I know that, as a tween, hating me is just going to have to be a part of life for awhile. But I’m just so scared.

An aside to Ben because I want to say this publicly: Thank you SO MUCH for your love and support and for helping me to become a better parent. For talking me through things, for a gentle touch to let me know it’s going to be okay, for the space I need sometimes to work through these things in my head or hammer them out on a keyboard, and for the strength I know it takes to help me learn and grow in this daily roller coaster of parenthood. And most importantly, for being the best father any kid could ever have. I love you.

LOST: MY SANITY

Tuesday, October 28th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

If found, please return at once. I’ll be easy to find because I’ll be here blogging every single day for the next 30 days (starting November 1st) since I’ve decided to participate in NaBloPoMo. I figured that since I’m kind of on the edge these days between partial sanity and a full blown case of The Crazy I’d just go ahead and take that final leap into the deep enad.

EVERy SINGLE DAY, NOVEMBER!! ARE YOU READY?!

I assume by around day 4 I’ll be regretting making the commitment and my posts will have deteriorated into nonsensical rambling clearly made by a delusional nutcase.

So, you know, it’ll be pretty much normal around her but with more posts.

Are you guys and girls participating? If so, comment and let me know. On November 1st when the theme changes I want to have a section to highlight and link to other NaBloPoMo-ers.

BOO!

Monday, October 27th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

Have I mentioned lately how much I love Halloween? The silly immature 10 year old in me still thinks it’s awesome that once a year I get to play dress up. HEEHEE

HALLOWEEN 2008: NON SKANKY KINDA EMO-ISH GOTHY WITCH GIRL I’m just kinda throwing this stuff together. The wig, some badass huge false lashes, some little spiders to put in my hair and probably a black shirt or dress and shoes.

HALLOWEEN 2006: SKANKY DEVIL It took three days to wash that crap out of my hair but but it was pretty badass. Also, I still love those tacky red lashes.

HALLOWEEN 2007: SKANKY WITCH! I think I’ll wear that hat again! LOVE IT.

Save, save, save.

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

January I was SUPPOSED to be getting a pretty substancial raise because I’ll be moving up a bit in positions here. The problem is that now that the USA is in such a financial toilet bomb I’m not sure how that’s going to go… which sucks because we could really use the extra money right now. Couldn’t everybody? I think what’s going to need to happen is that I’ll need to seem my car. We can get something that’s cheaper on gass, cheap auto insurance, cheaper tires, cheaper for common wear items. If something goes seriously wrong with my car it could get pretty expensive pretty quickly. *le sigh*

Vacation needed. Movie optional, nap necessary.

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments

Man, it’s been a really stressful few weeks. You know what I need? I need to go home to a nice, clean quiet house, dark room, candles burning, movie on, some comfy home theater seating to sit in, a nice glass of champagne, and Ben to cuddle with. And… maybe some chocolate cake and ice cream.

I need a vacation from the stress, seriously. I CAN HAZ?